37 Comments

Please tell me this is satire…

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Difficult to tell these days eh?

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Yes, and you really should consider the psychic impulse this creates and the number of new subscribers you'll get because you're an author that "gets them"...

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Definitely satire since the Cannon House Office Building is in D.C. and not New York; next to the U.N. However, the premise is very real. You don't need a building for the news agencies to gather into, just emails and "hot presses". They work seamlessly now, why spend the money to gather?

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Indeed, the daily 'memos' and 'releases' that the press agencies receive seem to be working just fine, so there is no need for them to gather in one physical location?

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Perfect timing GC!

Sometimes humanity makes you want to cry up to the heavens, and sometimes it’s even beyond weeping, and so a cathartic chuckle is the only thing left to us, in hopes of maintaining some semblance of sanity.

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My thoughts too Steve.👍 We have cognitive symmetry.

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Brothers of the mountain top💪🏼

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“Cognitive symmetry”

Excellent wordplay sir!

It’s a perfectly descriptive term.

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The CIA spook as the exemplar of the "free and open society that values diversity of thought and transparency.”

And this line just cracked me up- seemed like it was out of Mad magazine:

“We need more Wangs out there to probe for the truth. It’s just a big win for democracy and in the war against misinformation.”

"We need more Wangs out there...."

How can you not bust out laughing at that.

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The CIA has been producing the "news" for a long time, mostly hidden from view. At least now they're coming into the open. "Brought to you by Pfizer."

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Word is they have engaged the services of renowned linguistic and diction expert, Dr. Won Hung Lo of Adelphi University, to work with on-air talent. Known for his recent work: “We wanted to see how many subtle differences we could put into a 7 word sentence, either opening or closing a 3 minute segment, as these are the upper levels of attention span for average viewers. For instance, you may recall the now legendary, “This could be dangerous to our democracy,” Dr Lo beamed.

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(: Dr. Hu Fuk Yu, a long term rival of Won Hung Lo, claims that Lo is a hack and a scoundrel who stole Fuk Yu's research and who isn't even Hung Lo as his name falsely implies.

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"I trace my ancestry back to the Cultural Revolution of Mao Zedong, as most honorable Hu You knows" insisted Won to Atlantic Magazine's Sinthia Allbright. During an off-the-record interview it was later revealed he may well be a love child of Zedong.

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Dr Hang Far Low doesn't agree with any of this... 😂 😂 😂

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Brilliant. Instagram influencers can also visit WePlot to receive payment for amplifying the right hashtags. #maskup #wereallinthistogether #blm #vaccinated #boosted #saveukraine #imwithher #orangemanbad

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Brilliant! Now when the DHS conducts raids on mis-dis-mal / Dismal-information spreaders, they can round them all up efficiently!

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"WePlot"?? Is that a Freudian slip of the planned activity or am I missing something?

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So,... this is how the Ministry of Truth is born.....

Thanks for the satire, I hope it remains that way.

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What? Prof. Won Long Wang isn’t real? Say it isn’t so.😢

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Probing wangs... OUTSTANDING!

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Is it We Plot or We Plop?

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So I noticed that the press release stated no motto for WePlot. (Did I miss it?) Surely Wang understands the stabilizing power of a short rhetorical keel. I hope that he likes my suggestions:

Official: The News of a Nation. The Center of Information.

Unofficial: ...and ye shall know the news, and the news will make you free.

Alternate: Good stories are shared forever

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Took me a paragraph. Well done.

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Outstanding, big time kudos & thanks for a brilliant piece!

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Oh I know Professor Won Long Wang! I think his dad was Jia Chunwang (who did something important in China, can't remember now, something to do with the CIA, Afghanistan, Tiananmen protestors, and not liking George Soros) anyway, so good to hear his son is doing wonderful things for the United Socialists of America.

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